In India right now, with a mission to complete my new album(theme is a surprise), and a bigger mission: to learn how to improve my way of life, in the land of spirituality. Everyday I am working hard to focus my mind like a pinpoint, and discovering new things about myself. The path has been confusing at times, as I have gone through many different channels. But I have started to accept that each resource I have consulted has offered something of use to me. In Vipassana, I learned how to focus the breath, concentrate only on it, and keep as still as possible: a real exercise in self-discipline! I also learned to tune into the body. Although, I found myself constantly judging myself for the thoughts that entered my mind during my meditation, and feeling resentful for the pain and discomfort i experienced throughout the meditations. At the same time, I congratulate myself for my courage and will to succeed despite my physical and mental limitations; I went on meditating day after day, trying to unmagnify the pain I felt.
At OSHO, I discovered completely different, dynamic forms of meditation and became closer to my body. I especially enjoyed dancing free-flow with the music, like during our Sufi meditations. I experienced the joy of movement and dynamism, the grace and agility of my body, and learning new and creative methods of visualization.
Through Art of Living, I discovered how to feel myself breathing, letting the coolness of air into my throat and feeling the warm air leave me. I became more acquainted with sensing my body, focusing on each individual part and experiencing the unique sensation of being ALIVE.
Through a combination of yoga and physical movement and complete breathing and relaxation with vocalization, I have formed my own path for reaching contentment and connection with the self. In today's meditation, I often had trouble deciding WHAT aspect to focus on: the sound, the relaxation of my shoulders, the breath permeating my body.... Then I decided not to try to focus on anything, and just let it be. Enjoy the process and focus on what my body wants to focus on. The feeling of taking a deep breath in, and then releasing the body was extremely pleasurable. I stopped judging myself and trying to make each cycle perfect, because perfection is overrated. Rather perfection can be found in the dynamism, in spontaneity, and that is the true beauty of this constantly fluctuating world. I congratulate myself for another job well done, with the help of the Universe, holding my hand along each step of the way, leading me to make the decisions and choices I make; there is no right or wrong choice, only what happened and what didn't happen. So the moment I decide to open my eyes is already written in fate and is there for a reason, for my wellbeing. Once we can focus on relaxing ourselves into the present, opening up the body and the mind, creating space and time for ourselves, the universe and all its possibilities will be at our fingertips. Once we rid ourselves of negative and limiting thoughts: worrying about the future, regretting the past, and resenting the present, we open up new reservoirs in our minds and hearts, filled with color and creative energy.
So, remember to embrace the present as much as possible in whatever it offers you, and learn to train the mind to perceive the present with positive and optimistic eyes; the present is a gift, each moment of it, not for what you make of it, but for what it IS.
